Unbearably Gone
Published in the December 2018 issue of Write Launch Literary Magazine
poetry
​
Once I sat in a haven of
eternality
a monument to saying farewell
to loved ones
fragrant with lilies and flowing with
meaningful words
comforted by a family with decades of
integrity
in handling my loved one’s
grieving moments

Except instead of a haven of
eternality
I was in a mausoleum of temporary
trickery
and there were no lilies to rescue
my tongue
thick and rank with the noisome
remnants
of bodies trying to leave this
world

Once I left you to rest in the
heavenly slumber
of your casket kept alive by
faith and devotion
with inspirational words of
peace and wisdom
written by me and tucked in your satin
forever resting place

Except instead of leaving you
to rest
you were stored away in this
hole
for broken things temporarily
fixed up
and instead of speaking any words
at all
I was sick from the noxious fumes of
death
and the absurd illusion
of forever

Once I sat through your end of life
celebration
while I unraveled at the walls people
built
under the burden of their
grief
I suppose
they set about making
funerals

​This was the first
of many places
where I found you
unbearably gone.